It’s too late to run him in Iowa, but maybe they can throw some of the money they might otherwise spend on poorly-designed caucus apps his way and get him started in New Hampshire. Bol-Ton, the weasel. Legend says that when the weasel kills the cockatrice, the weasel himself also dies. Maybe he really is the perfect candidate. Would that other presidential candidates would so obliging self-destruct. If only we could pit them all against each other. Then we could just sweep the ashes away.