Surrounded by mad, shrieking idiots drunk on the ocean, it's hard to remember the importance of the cargo we're carrying, hidden below decks. Sometimes we forget that the most important things are exactly the things moronic inspirational memes, despite their intentions, drain of real meaning. Hang in there baby, Friday's almost here. We have to cross this ocean, survive the lunatic wrath of Neptune, and deliver our cargo of love and devotion to the other shore. Not all of us will make it. Not all of the beauty in the world will survive unexploited or unmutilated. The world itself might end, or our ability to live on it. But what choice do we have?
In a Moment of Truth, your captain Jeff Dorchen explains why our love is a ship and America is an ocean is lies - surrounded by sharks and New York Times features on Alicia Silverstone and an Orange Neptune and his court of salt-water drunk supporters drying to drag us down before we get wherever this stupid boat is headed.
Read the transcript here